Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
Chapter 14 Author's Notes:
Content warning: Wen Chao and Wang Lingjiao are openly homophobic, including Wen Chao using a slur.
Wei Wuxian thinks he'll be riding the high of that performance for a while. They still have to sit through Wen Chao and Wang Lingjiao's second song (he's not sure where Wang Lingjiao gets off calling them creepy when this married guy 25 years older than her is constantly looking at her like that and she eats it up), and neither of them seem capable of keeping their eyes on the stage. He tries his hardest to be mindful of the cameras, but Lan Zhan is sitting right next to him! In the damn flowy robes! This show is soooo lucky his sister is a producer, because if it weren't for that he's truly not sure he could bring himself to care what the network thinks about him staring openly at Lan Zhan instead of paying attention to the rest of the show.
As soon as they're backstage he throws himself at Lan Zhan hard enough that Lan Zhan stumbles a little. He's not stupid enough to kiss him in front of everyone, not when they haven't talked about any of this yet, but he needs to touch him. Lan Zhan seems to agree, hugging him tightly and not seeming any more eager to let go than Wei Wuxian is.
"Holy shit, Lan Zhan, that was so good!" he whispers, and it's a massive understatement. "Can we just do that again and again? We don't need other songs, right?" Lan Zhan huffs a laugh into his hair.
"Oh, is that what's going on here?" he hears Wang Lingjiao's screechy voice even though she's nowhere near them. "Are they, like, for real gay? No wonder. Ugh."
Wei Wuxian pulls back from Lan Zhan with a sigh. As much as he would love to yell "jealous, bitch?" and climb Lan Zhan like a tree right in front of her, she and Wen Chao are basically the only two people he currently does not at all trust to keep it quiet if they do find out.
"Not sure anyone's anything is your business, little girl." Mianmian is already on the offensive, and Wei Wuxian really does adore her. "What you saw on stage was the product of those two working their asses off for the past two weeks, and they deserve to celebrate for a minute; maybe if you'd put ten percent of that effort into your performance you wouldn't be going home."
"Everyone knows they're just playing into the CP fans," Wen Chao sneers. "It's disgusting. I wouldn't lower myself to that just to stay on a show like this. I'm only here as a favor to the producers anyhow."
Wei Wuxian catches up to them then, pulling Lan Zhan along by the elbow only because he's not going to hold his hand in front of these two. "Ah, see, that's where we differ," he says. "I'm also only here as a favor to the producers, but that doesn't stop me from taking my role as a mentor seriously and making sure that Lan Zhan has the chance to really showcase his talents. I'm sure Wang Lingjiao here is only acting out because she's disappointed, now that she realizes she could have had a mentor who would actually help her develop her career instead of just trying to get her into bed behind his wife's back."
Wang Lingjiao gasps and latches onto Wen Chao's arm. "Chaochao, you can't let him say things like that!"
Wei Wuxian rolls his eyes, but Wen Chao suddenly steps up and shoves him in the chest. Wei Wuxian laughs in surprise as he staggers back a little, wondering if this guy actually thinks he's going to bait him into a physical fight while they're still on set. (Or anywhere else, Wei Wuxian isn't an idiot, but what the fuck.) He can feel Lan Zhan tense beside him, and he gives his elbow a squeeze.
"You wanna say that again, you little bitch?"
"Wen Chao and Wang Lingjiao," Jiang Yanli snaps as she walks up to them with her clipboard. "Get your confessional done and get home. And Wen Chao, you lay a hand on our talent again and I will not hesitate to call the police."
"'Our talent'? I'm your talent, too! Did you hear what this faggot was saying about me?"
Yanli's face goes slack into the cold mask Wei Wuxian rarely sees her put on. "You are no longer a participant on this program, Mr. Wen," she says flatly. "Don't worry about the confessional. You have five minutes to collect your belongings and vacate the premises before I have security escort you out. You too, Miss Wang."
"You can't—"
"Sorry, ten minutes." Yanli has to raise her voice to cut him off. "I'll give you a few minutes to get out of your stage clothes, since some of those pieces belong to the show." She taps on her phone a few times. "Ten minutes starting now."
"See if I ever agree to be on anything for DragonTV again," Wen Chao shouts. Yanli doesn't flinch. "I'll have your job for this!"
"Oh will you?" Wei Wuxian asks easily. "What's her name?" Wen Chao turns a confused glare on him. "Who are you going to demand they fire?" Wen Chao's only response is for his face to get redder.
"Chaochao, let's just go," Wang Lingjiao simpers. "They need us a lot more than we need them, right?"
"Of course they do," Wen Chao grunts, and starts to pull her away.
"Nine minutes thirty seconds," Yanli says cheerfully as they leave.
The other contestants, who had frozen around them, slowly untense as the two stalk off.
"Thank god," Yanli says under her breath once they're out of earshot. "I would never actually manipulate the votes, but if anyone else had been voted off I would have been sorely tempted to. I'd rather deal with Xue Yang any day."
Wen Qing raises her hands like she's weighing two things on a scale. "Wen Chao, Jin Guangshan. Not sure which is worse. Who the fuck invited either of them?"
Yanli rolls her eyes. "Old men at the network who still think Jin Guangshan has done nothing wrong—if you ask them behind closed doors with all the mics off."
"Oh! Um." Qin Su waves a hand to get everyone's attention on her. "Speaking of, I'm trying to tell everyone I know before this becomes public knowledge in a couple of days, but, um... It turns out Jin Guangshan is my biological father." There are gasps and "oh god"s all around. She presses her lips together, clearly trying not to cry. "And, unsurprisingly, that happened under, um... very upsetting circumstances. Sorry, Yanli, I know this is probably going to cause problems for the show—"
She is cut off by several people all jumping to insist that she not apologize for that piece of shit's actions. Yanli wraps her in a hug.
"Oh, sweetie, I'm so sorry. Don't you worry about the show, okay? That's my problem, not yours. And the problem is Jin Guangshan, not you. You've been a joy to work with, don't let anyone say that that man's behavior is a reflection on you. Not ever—if anyone tries to, just tell me, okay?" She holds Qin Su at arm's length while Qin Su wipes at her tears. "I'm serious. I don't care if it's five years from now, if anyone tries to hold him against you I will bite their dick off for you."
"I'm setting up a Qin Su Defense Squad groupchat on WeChat," Mianmian says, tapping on her phone. "Adding everyone here. I think I speak for all of us when I say that Yanli is right, it doesn't matter if this show is a distant memory, we will not let them get away with using that creep to smear you."
"Hell yeah," Wei Wuxian says as he accepts the invitation to the group chat. Everyone else murmurs agreement as they do the same—even Lan Zhan nods with a firm "Mn."
"Besides," Yanli points out, "this makes you my sister-in-law! And A-Xian's, well, sister-in-law-in-law?"
"Oh fuck," Wei Wuxian says, realizing she's right. "I hadn't even thought of that. Welcome to the family, I guess!"
Qin Su nods, but looks completely overwhelmed.
"Okay, why don't you take a few minutes to get cleaned up and settle down before you guys do your confessional, okay?" Yanli tells her. "A-Xian, do you two want to go first?"
"No problem," he says, "I'm still amped from that performance and I couldn't take it out on Wen Chao, so I might as well babble at the camera about it instead."
As they head over to the confessional room, Wei Wuxian pulls his jacket off and starts rolling up his sleeves. Lan Zhan notices. Lan Zhan stops caring about looking where he's going in favor of watching him.
Just before they go in, he stops, and Lan Zhan stops beside him. He leans in.
"And then," he whispers, "there's no way this will get it all out of my system, so I'll be dragging you straight home."
Lan Zhan hums, his eyes traveling down Wei Wuxian's body. "Cute that you think you'll be doing the dragging," he murmurs. Then he turns and goes straight for the stools they're supposed to sit on, leaving Wei Wuxian to follow in his wake.
As they leave the confessional, Wei Wuxian manages to grab his sister.
"Jie, they are not recording us in the car tonight."
Yanli looks at her clipboard. "Actually..."
"Nonono," he says. "I am telling you that you do not want to record us tonight."
She gives him a Look and whispers, "A-Xian, you cannot do anything in the car, you poor driver—"
"I know!" he says. "I'm just saying, if you make us have some artificial conversation about how smoothly the windows roll down, everyone who watches it will be wondering why we're talking about rolling the windows down when we very obviously would rather be—"
"Okay, okay," she says, rolling her eyes. "You owe me."
"Literally anything," he says, and kisses her cheek before running off.
Unfortunately, they can't wear the costumes home. Wei Wuxian briefly considers just offering to pay for them, but he actually does own his own three-piece suits and he's sure Lan Zhan knows where to get a more authentic hanfu. He changes as quickly as possible and meets Lan Zhan outside. Thankfully, there is no camera even to watch them get into the car.
Lan Zhan graciously opens the door for him, then shoves him inside.
The entire ride home they don't stop touching—down low, where the driver can't see, hands and thighs and knees. Nothing untoward. Once they're at the building, Lan Zhan pulls him out of the car and continues to steer him as much as he can while not making it obvious when they pass other people. He does get manhandled into the elevator, but then someone else enters on the next floor and so when they exit they do it very politely.
There's no one in the hallway as they approach their door, and Lan Zhan grabs him by the hair and one arm and frog-marches him the last twenty feet to the door. Wei Wuxian is half-hard by the time they get there.
"Unlock it," Lan Zhan growls into his ear.
"Guess your hands are a little busy, huh?" Wei Wuxian says breathily with a cheeky grin as he pulls out his wallet with the key card in it. In response, Lan Zhan doesn't growl anything into his ear—he just growls. It's all Wei Wuxian can do not to moan.
The moment they're inside, Lan Zhan slams him up against the wall to kiss him, huge hands wandering everywhere. Their legs slot together, and it's not long before they're full-on humping each other fully clothed. Wei Wuxian pushes Lan Zhan back a little.
"Oh, no no no," he says. "We are not coming in our pants against the wall."
"No," Lan Zhan agrees. He pulls Wei Wuxian away from the wall and turns him toward the bedroom, but before shoving him toward it bites his earlobe hard enough to make him yelp and says, "I will be coming inside of Wei Ying."
"Uh-huh," Wei Wuxian gasps as he stumbles toward his bedroom. "Yep, that is definitely the plan. Hey, can I take my pants off yet? These jeans are not comfortable anymore."
As desperate as they are for each other, there's no reason to rush tonight, and they manage to slow down a little and take more than five minutes to get naked, which Wei Wuxian thinks is a truly impressive feat of restraint on both their parts. They do eventually get to the part that has Wei Wuxian fumbling for the nightstand drawer.
"I have lube," he pants as he blindly feels for it. "Condoms, too, if you, ah. If you want." Lan Zhan's eyebrows twitch upward in a question. "I, um. I haven't actually slept with anyone in like a year or two, but I get tested every three months like clockwork, so I'm clean if you, uh—"
"I have not had sex with anyone since college," Lan Zhan says immediately. "Until this week."
Wei Wuxian's brain stutters to a half and he actually drops the lube, which clatters to the floor.
"Wait, you what? Nobody? In what, seven or eight years?" Lan Zhan shakes his head, and Wei Wuxian can see the slightest bit of hurt forming in his expression. "I mean—no, no, I'm not judging you, I'm just—Lan Zhan, you're the hottest man alive, you can't tell me nobody's been interested."
"But I have not been," Lan Zhan says simply. "I slept with several men in college, including two committed relationships of a few months each, but mostly because it seemed like the... normal thing to do." Wei Wuxian winces internally. That is never a good reason to do something. "I think I believed myself to be more attracted to them than I really was."
"Yeah, I've been there," Wei Wuxian says.
"After I graduated, I decided there was no reason to pursue either a sexual or romantic relationship with anyone else unless my attraction to them was undeniable." Wei Wuxian has to grin a little smugly at that, and Lan Zhan kisses him gently. "Yes, that would be Wei Ying."
"So... what I'm hearing is that maybe we don't need to worry about condoms?"
Lan Zhan digs his fingers into the meat of Wei Wuxian's ass. "I would very much rather not."
What happens next is easily the most feral sex Wei Wuxian has ever had—it's very definitely a top contender for the best sex, but absolutely takes the title for most feral by a very large margin. Lan Zhan uses the lube, but not much of it, and spends minimal time opening Wei Wuxian up before taking him from behind. There's scratching and biting and hair-pulling. It's incredible. They absolutely cannot do it again within a week of a performance, because Wei Wuxian will be feeling it in several different places for days.
He collapses onto the bed afterward, panting and only half-cognizant of the wet spot of his own come he's fallen into, or of Lan Zhan's leaking out of him. Lan Zhan stays braced over him, stroking a hand down his back and covering his shoulders with gentle kisses that are completely at odds with everything else they just did. He's disappointed when Lan Zhan moves off of him, and his stomach drops right out when Lan Zhan gets up and leaves the room. He's only just pieced together enough brain cells to realize that Lan Zhan went into his (Wei Wuxian's) bathroom, not out into the living room or to his own bedroom or bathroom, when Lan Zhan is back. Apparently Wei Wuxian was completely oblivious to the sound of running water, as Lan Zhan now has multiple hot, wet washcloths and proceeds to clean Wei Wuxian up gently and thoroughly.
"Wow, what service," Wei Wuxian quips as he rolls over to let Lan Zhan wipe off his front. He winces when he puts weight on his bottom. "Oh! Ooh. Guess I'll be sleeping on my side tonight. Holy shit, Lan Zhan. I'd say I didn't know you had it in you, but I'll be honest, I kinda suspected." Lan Zhan gives him a smile that is very small and very sly before tossing the cloths to one side and climbing back into bed in order to rearrange Wei Wuxian so they're spooning like they did before.
Wei Wuxian lets himself drift, half-conscious, for a while, but eventually starts to feel more awake. Lan Zhan seems to have fallen asleep behind him, but when he rolls over to face him, Lan Zhan's eyes flutter open.
“Just so you know," Wei Wuxian says, his voice hushed for no reason except not wanting to burst the little bubble surrounding them, "we need to talk—sooner rather than later—about, y'know. This. And who we can tell, who we can do things like touch each other around. Not right now, though, that would be a terrible conversation to have right after sex."
Lan Zhan hums in agreement. "No decisions while on endorphins."
"Yep," Wei Wuxian says. "Bad, bad idea." Because if he just went and said everything going through his head right now he would probably go way too far and say way too much to a man he has really only known for about two months. "But I'm saying it now because there is at least a 30% chance that if I didn't, then once the endorphins are gone I'd just be like, haha, talking about feelings like adults! How crazy! That's a problem for future Wei Wuxian! But now you know I think we should talk about it, and I know you'll make me." Lan Zhan nods firmly, then kisses Wei Wuxian.
When Wei Wuxian's alarm goes off the next morning, he looks around blearily to find a mug of coffee on his nightstand and Lan Zhan sitting up in bed next to him, scrolling on his phone while drinking a mug of what Wei Wuxian assumes is his usual green tea.
"Wow," says as he struggles to sit up. "You got up, made me coffee, and then came back to bed? Ow, ooh, sitting kinda bad."
"I also got these from my bed," Lan Zhan says. He bends over his side of the bed and produces two pillows. "Down pillows. I brought them from home. They may be more comfortable for Wei Ying to sit on."
"Oooh!" Wei Wuxian props himself up so that Lan Zhan can slide the pillows under him and they are more comfortable than the mattress, even if he is still a little sore. "Well, if you're not going to apologize for ravaging your Wei Ying, at least you take proper care of him afterward."
Lan Zhan leans in and kisses him behind the ear, then down the side of his throat.
"I will not apologize," he says softly, "but I will always take good care of my Wei Ying."
Wei Wuxian hadn't even really realized what he'd said, but the fact that Lan Zhan seems quite pleased with it keeps him from feeling awkward about it. He decides not to think too hard about the always right at the moment. At some point he will likely obsess over it, but for now he can put it aside. Sort of.
Instead, he snuggles into Lan Zhan's side with his coffee and glances at what Lan Zhan was looking at on his phone.
"Oh my gosh, Lan Zhan, are you looking at pictures of cute animals?" He looks up to see Lan Zhan's ears turning pink. "Show me show me show me! What did you find? This is truly one of the only reasons the internet does not completely suck ass."
It turns out that Lan Zhan is on social media—but only Oasis, where he does not post anything of his own whatsoever or have any followers, and exclusively follows accounts of people posting photos of their pets. Mostly rabbits. Wei Wuxian squeals as much over Lan Zhan having a soft spot for bunnies as he does over the bunnies themselves.
By the time he finishes his mug of coffee and sets it aside, he's feeling much more awake. He's about to suggest they get up and start getting ready for the day, but before he can, Lan Zhan says, "Should we talk now? About the things you mentioned last night?"
Wei Wuxian heaves a sigh. "I did tell you that specifically so you could not let me wiggle out of it." Lan Zhan hums in agreement, and Wei Wuxian snuggles into his side in a move that is entirely meant to avoid having to look him in the eye too much until Wei Wuxian is feeling more confident.
"I believe the first item on the agenda," Lan Zhan says, voice carrying just enough irony to not actually sound like a businessman, "was 'This.'"
"Wow, cutting right to the chase, ah?" Wei Wuxian says, but he knows the other things he mentioned would be pretty hard to discuss without figuring that out first. "So, we already decided this isn't just sex." Lan Zhan hums in agreement and kisses the top of his head. "But it's probably better to be clear about what it is, not just what it isn't."
"Whatever makes Wei Ying happy," Lan Zhan says immediately.
Wei Wuxian's head immediately snaps up, and suddenly making eye contact isn't hard at all. "Okay, hold up, that makes it sound like you're willing to just... take whatever scraps I give you, even if it's not what you want."
Lan Zhan opens his mouth, then closes it, frowning. "I... was not thinking of it in those terms..."
"But that's kind of what that means," Wei Wuxian points out. Lan Zhan nods slowly, not looking at him. "Oof, okay. Let's try again. If we don't want the same thing, we'll talk about it and we'll deal with it, but nobody gets to just give up on their own happiness. I've paid my therapist waaaaayyyy too much money over the past decade to just let that happen." Lan Zhan nods, surer this time, and looks at Wei Wuxian again. Wei Wuxian can hardly speak in the face of the sudden intensity of his golden eyes. "Okay," he says quietly, "Lan Zhan, what do you want?"
"Wei Ying," he says simply. "I want Wei Ying to be mine. And I want to be yours."
"Well, great," Wei Wuxian says, a little dazed. "Perfect. That's exactly what I want. Boyfriends—check! Next item on the agenda."
"Telling people, and public displays of affection," Lan Zhan says. "For varying definitions of 'public,' I assume."
"Right," Wei Wuxian says, and takes a deep breath. He's thought about this, probably way too much since he started to realize their feelings were at least somewhat mutual. "So. You know I'm not out." Lan Zhan nods. "But... I could be. If we're together, I'd be okay with that, I think. If I take a career hit, I take a career hit, but I'm not sure it would be that bad. Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen have been fine. When they came out and got married a couple years ago, they didn't lose nearly as many Weibo followers or concert ticket sales as people expected. Obviously they were more well-established than me, but I'm in a really solid place, career-wise. Ever since they went public, I've sort of half-thought, y'know, if I ever met the right guy, maybe I wouldn't let the fact that he's a guy hold me back." He shakes his head, clearing it from the slightly pensive place those thoughts always take him. "But, ah. Whether or not I'm ready to come out publicly actually isn't the most pressing question right now. Partially because, unless I hear otherwise from my sister, that's not happening until well after the show is over, for the sake of her job. She's going to try to feel the network out and see if they'd be comfortable with it happening before that, but whether or not my career will take a hit, I'm not gambling with hers."
"That is understandable," Lan Zhan says, nodding. "I am..." He swallows. "Flattered is not strong enough a word, for how it feels to know that you would be willing to do that for me."
Wei Wuxian gazes into his eyes, and find himself smiling at the thought of what he'd be willing to do for Lan Zhan. He doesn't want to derail his main point with the whole intensity discussion, though, so he just says, "Lan Zhan. This is important to me. You are important to me. I've hidden that away from the world before, and I don't want that for us." He takes a breath. "But like I said, that's not the most pressing question. Even if I don't come out publicly yet, this doesn't have to be a total secret from everyone we know. Our families, our friends—the other contestants on the show, most of whom actually are friends and family to me. I really, really wanted to kiss you last night, but I didn't trust Wen Chao or Wang Lingjiao. Now that they're gone, maybe we should talk about everyone else."
"None of them know yet that you're bisexual, besides Jiang Yanli and Nie Huaisang?" Lan Zhan asks. Wei Wuxian shakes his head. "It is up to you. And I say that not to discount my own agency—it's apparently not common knowledge, I assume because I haven't dated anyone in a long time, but I've been out to my family and friends for a decade. It's possible Nie Huaisang knows, since I know his brother does."
"If so, I promise he will know we're banging," Wei Wuxian says. "Even though we haven't even been in the same room with him since the show started. He's probably sitting there right now drinking his coffee, and he's about to just set it down and go, huh, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji fucked nasty last night, I can sense it."
Lan Zhan huffs a laugh. "My point is, I am not in any way in the closet, but I understand why you are and how uncomfortable a process coming out can be. I would want that to happen on your schedule, not mine."
Wei Wuxian nods. "Okay. Well, honestly, I think I'm fine with everyone else knowing. The crew and production staff, it's not worth their careers to tell anyone, they know the drill on that stuff. I mean, I dunno if I want to like, stand up and make an announcement, like 'hey, everyone who's not my boyfriend stand up—not so fast, Lan Zhan!' But I might just, I dunno, hold your hand if I feel like holding your hand, or kiss you if I feel like kissing you. And you should feel free to do the same, okay? And then we can deal with the questions when they come."
Lan Zhan looks amused. "All right. I will warn you, though, that I always want to be touching Wei Ying."
Wei Wuxian grins. "That's fine by me."
They have the day off before they have to start preparing for the next episode—well, off from the show. Wei Wuxian has several online meetings with producers who want to work on his next album, and Lan Zhan is teaching a workshop in the afternoon for students at the Shanghai Theater Academy.
Wei Wuxian arranges for them to get dinner with Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan, figuring he should probably come out to the biggest queer influences in his life before anyone else. The two of them are, of course, nothing but supportive. They seem both amused and touched that Lan Zhan very clearly behaves toward them the way one would expect him to behave toward his future in-laws, and Wei Wuxian might possibly have stars in his eyes over it.
He definitely sucks Lan Zhan's cock over it as soon as they're home.
Then it's back to thinking about their next performances.
"How's your English?" he asks Lan Zhan as they're curled up on the couch, talking about some options. They've already settled on one possibility.
"Passable," Lan Zhan says in English.
Wei Wuxian bursts out laughing. "Okay, I don't know that word, I'll just assume yours is better than mine, then."
"Passable," Lan Zhan says in Mandarin. "I would not call myself fluent, but I spent a semester in London at the Royal College of Music. I have specifically spent quite a bit of time working on pronunciation in English, French, and Italian, for singing purposes. I don't understand nearly as much Italian or French, though. Are we allowed to do songs in English?"
"Oh yeah," Wei Wuxian says. "There are a couple every season. Bao Shan and Lan Jingyi have already done one."
"What were you thinking?" Lan Zhan asks curiously.
"Okay, well, this is kind of an out-there suggestion," Wei Wuxian says. "Back when I was a kid, Song Lan, being, y'know, a rock star in a country that wasn't making a ton of rock music, was big into rock from all over the world. And he played a lot of it for me well before I could actually understand any of it, but I loved it. For a long time, he had a tradition of giving me CDs from my favorite international bands for my birthday. He kept it up for a long time, but it finally kinda died out when CDs started dying out. And I was just thinking last night when we were out with them, about this one sort of sad song I always really liked. I didn't know what the words meant when I was a kid, but when I got older, one day I dug out a bunch of those old CDs and listened to them, and this time I could understand like half of it and wound up looking up most of the rest. It was right when things with Jiutang were going downhill, so it really resonated with me at the time and kind of stuck with me. And I think it tells a really interesting story for us to dig into."
"Do you have it for me to listen to?" Lan Zhan asks.
"I just pulled it up," Wei Wuxian says. "It's called Call and Answer and the band is, ah. Barenaked Ladies."
Lan Zhan suddenly looks like he's not so sure he wants to hear the song. "I understand that much English. Please tell me the band's name is not relevant to this song."
"It's not," Wei Wuxian reassures him, and plays the song.
Lan Zhan listens intently. When it's over he says "I understood most of it. Not everything. Is this a well-known song?"
"Ha, well, that's the one downside," Wei Wuxian says. "The audience is mostly only going to want English songs they've heard before, and I really doubt any of them have heard this one."
"Do you think they would penalize us badly enough to get one of us kicked off the show?" Lan Zhan asks.
"Eh," Wei Wuxian says. "Probably not? Not if we do it well. But we aren't likely to come in first or anything. Here, here's a full translation of the lyrics."
Lan Zhan reads over them, then plays the song again while reading them. "Exhumed," he murmurs to himself in English. "Hm." When it's done, he nods. "I agree. We can do a lot with that. The harmonies, the call-and-response, the story of lovers trying to come back together, but it's not clear that it's going to work out."
"Also," Wei Wuxian says, "I was thinking since if we do 约定(Commitment) you'll play piano again, maybe I'd play guitar on this."
This clearly startles Lan Zhan. "You play guitar?"
Wei Wuxian laughs. "Yeah! I didn't bring it, but I can have it sent down from Beijing by tomorrow if we want."
"Yes, do that," Lan Zhan says, "whether or not we use this song."
"You are so cute." Wei Wuxian kisses him on the nose. "But yeah, when I started writing my own stuff I decided I needed to learn some instrument, and guitar seemed easier than piano. I mean, I can play dizi too, Madam Yu insisted we all learn some instrument just to show off that she had such smart, cultured kids, but that's... not so useful when you're also trying to write lyrics."
"Dizi." Lan Zhan just stares at him. "You play dizi, too. Do you still play at all?"
"Mmm, yeah, that one I probably should have mentioned earlier," Wei Wuxian admits. "I still have one, at the very least. I don't play it often, so I'm sure I'm super rusty but I haven't completely forgotten how to." He grins. "Should I have that sent with the guitar?"
"Yes," Lan Zhan says firmly, looking at Wei Wuxian very intently.
"Lan Zhan, is my musical prowess getting you horny?"
"Always," Lan Zhan says, and pulls Wei Wuxian into his lap.
The next evening, when Mianmian knocks on their door to see if Wei Wuxian wants to get dinner with her, the Wens, A-Qing, and Qin Su, Wei Wuxian turns back to Lan Zhan.
"Hey, Lan Zhan, wanna get dinner with everyone?"
Unlike every other time Wei Wuxian has invited him, this time he looks up from his guqin and says yes. Mianmian's eyes go wide.
"Okay, uh, well, the others are meeting us outside our place in half an hour."
"We'll be there!"
28 minutes later, he and Lan Zhan are about to head out their door.
"Thank you for doing this," Wei Wuxian says sincerely. "I know you don't like being social."
"I want to get to know your friends," Lan Zhan says. "It matters now in a way it didn't before. I am not entirely antisocial... only seventy percent, perhaps."
Wei Wuxian kisses him deeply, then pulls him out the door.
The others are gathered in the hallway, Mianmian and Wen Ning just closing up their own door. Wei Wuxian holds tight to Lan Zhan's hand as they approach the group.
A few people exclaim about Lan Zhan finally joining them as they say hello to Wei Wuxian—Mianmian is the first to notice their hands. It's very clear when she does, because she does a literal double take and then stares openly.
One by one, the others notice and also start staring at their joined hands.
"Okay, wow," Wei Wuxian says once everyone has gone silent in favor of staring at their hands (except for A-Qing, who looks vaguely confused by everyone's silence). "You guys just made this way more awkward than I was expecting! Good job everybody, great work all around."
"Oh, no no no," Mianmian starts. She is no longer focused on their hands, at least. "We only get half the credit in making this awkward. You are the one who decided to just show up here showing that off, instead of, I don't know, telling any of us, including some of your closest friends—"
"With your words, Wei Wuxian," Wen Qing picks up from her. "From your mouth, from your fingers, whatever works. 'Hey guys, guess what, Lan Wangji—sorry, Lan Zhan and I are a thing now, just so you know!' That is how you inform your friends you are dating someone, not just showing up as if everyone should already know—"
"Like, I'll even give you a pass on the coming out part," Mianmian adds. "Probably not the objectively best choice of methods, but y'know, not for me to judge there. You do that how you need to do that. But the fact that you are dating one of our coworkers—"
"And how the hell could I have come out like this and told you we were dating beforehand?" Wei Wuxian demands.
"Like I said, objectively not the best choice!" Mianmian exclaims.
"Congratulations, Wei-ge," Wen Ning says. "Congratulations, Lan Wangji. Mostly congratulations to you, you're very lucky to be dating him." He's been quiet the whole time, but looking amused. Qin Su seems to have whispered an explanation to A-Qing, and now the two of them are also quiet, but in a more "maybe I am in the middle of someone else's family drama" kind of way.
"Agreed," Lan Zhan says. Wei Wuxian realizes Lan Zhan is standing slightly behind him. It's very cute that his rather large boyfriend is so easily intimidated by very small women. Wei Wuxian will have to let these two know that Yanli already handled the shovel talk and maybe they should not actively try to scare him off.
"Why thank you, A-Ning," Wei Wuxian says graciously. "And thank you, Wen Qing and Mianmian, since I know you're only yelling at me out of love. A-Qing and Qin Su, I apologize for provoking them."
"Um, congrats!" Qin Su says with an awkward smile.
A-Qing gives them a thumbs up. "Yeah! Very cool!"
"Okay, can we go eat now?" Wei Wuxian asks, only to notice that Mianmian is opening her door back up. "Did you forget something?"
"Nope!" she says, and pushes the door wide open. "We are now ordering in so that you can spill allllll the dirt, because I'm assuming you wouldn't want to do that in the middle of a crowded restaurant."
"Good call," Wen Qing says, and goes straight inside. Wen Ning nods and follows her.
Qin Su looks confused and a little scared, but seems to default to following her senior, while A-Qing says "Oh, I love dirt!" and goes in with a slightly manic smile on her face.
Wei Wuxian sighs heavily. "Is this okay?" he asks Lan Zhan.
"I will survive," Lan Zhan says, sounding slightly resigned, and they go inside.
Wei Wuxian does have his instruments sent from Beijing.
He starts working on Call and Answer on the guitar, but also playing random things for Lan Zhan and playing along with him when he plays his guqin. Sometimes, when he's alone, he starts plucking out Lan Zhan's song on the guitar and scribbling down snatches of lyrics that come to him.
The dizi, he is indeed rusty at—but he has a feeling that if he's going to be dating Lan Zhan, relearning an ancient instrument might be a good idea, so he works on it. Lan Zhan is very encouraging, and sometimes his encouragements don't even involve sex.
Call and Answer starts coming together very nicely—it's not going to be a high-concept, high-energy performance like Mirage or 时候, but they still spend a lot of time getting the blocking just how they want it for the story they're telling. Wei Wuxian is still a little nervous about doing a song in English that probably nobody in the audience has ever heard, so the lyrics in Mandarin will be projected on a screen behind them.
The first verse, they'll be on opposite sides of the stage, alone, not talking to each other so much as themselves. On the first chorus, as they call and response, they'll start glancing at each other, somewhat reluctantly. On the second verse, Lan Zhan will start walking toward him and they'll start addressing each other more directly, feeling each other out. Wei Wuxian puts his guitar down partway through the verse so that on You think we're here to play a game of who loves more than whom he can approach Lan Zhan as well, and they can accuse each other directly. The next chorus and verse they both spend wandering the stage, sometimes passing each other, looking at or away from each other, until at It's time to make this something that is more than only fair they're back to back. The last chorus is them turning to each other longingly, promising to each other, only to build to the final verse where it's clear how much trust has been lost as they fling accusations and warnings at each other. By the end, it's not clear at all if the two will be able to fix what's broken between them.
It makes a nice contrast to their other song, Michael Wong's 约定—thematically and emotionally, at least, if not musically or even that much in terms of staging, really. For this one, while for most of the song they'll be on opposite sides of the stage, facing almost completely away from each other, two separate lovers sending their promises out into the universe and hoping the other is still there, on the last chorus Lan Zhan will get up from the piano and meet Wei Wuxian in the middle, making it very clear that after three years this couple is honoring their promise to each other. The final 我更爱你了(I love you even more), delivered unambiguously to each other, is easily their most blatant onstage romantic gesture.
"Call and Answer is the more dynamic performance," Lan Zhan says. "Shouldn't we save that as the audience's last impression of us?"
Wei Wuxian shakes his head. "I agree that it's more interesting staging, but I'm still a little concerned about closing on a song they don't know. Plus, I think giving 约定 a happy ending will be a pleasant surprise, I think it'll get people rooting for us."
Lan Zhan's eyebrows pull together. "What do you mean?"
"Have you watched the music video?" Lan Zhan shakes his head. "The video makes it a tragedy, where both of them think the other one has forgotten their promise to meet and so they never find each other. So some people associate it with that and think of it as a sad song."
"I see," Lan Zhan says. "It hadn't occurred to me to interpret it like that."
"Well, y'know, the public loves a love song but they love it twice as much if it's a sad, bitter love song," Wei Wuxian says with a smirk.
"I don't think I do," Lan Zhan says. "At least the ending of Call and Answer is ambiguous—they have obstacles to overcome, but if they're both willing to put in the effort, it may have a happy ending."
"Yeah, me neither. That's why I stopped doing them." Wei Wuxian threads their fingers together. "Okay, besides the one ambiguous ending in Call and Answer, only happy endings for us."
"Lan Zhan, we've gotta use your song in the finale."
Lan Zhan raises an eyebrow as he lets the strings go quiet. "I thought you didn't want to jinx it by thinking about the finale before we get through the next episode."
"Ugh, I know, I know," Wei Wuxian whines. "But we have to, it's too good not to!"
"That will be difficult without lyrics."
Wei Wuxian scoots closer and nestles his head on Lan Zhan's shoulder. "Welllllllll, I may have had some thoughts on that. Nothing fully-formed, but it's maybe starting to come together in my head."
"If you write the lyrics," Lan Zhan says, "then yes, we must use it."
Wei Wuxian wraps his arms around Lan Zhan's middle. "Lan Zhan, you spoil me."
"Ridiculous," Lan Zhan mutters, stroking his hair. "Wei Ying is an accomplished lyricist. Is everyone who uses your lyrics spoiling you?"
"Maybe they are," Wei Wuxian says. "Does the song have a name yet?"
"Mn."
"So... what is it? I want to be sure my lyrics aren't totally off the mark. Like, what if it's called Monster Truck Rally and I was writing a song about snakes?"
"I am sure the snakes could be a metaphor for a monster truck rally."
Wei Wuxian pokes him in the side, making him squirm.
"For real, Lan Zhan!"
Lan Zhan sighs and looks down at him. He tucks a piece of Wei Wuxian's hair behind his ear. Wei Wuxian loves when he does that.
"Wangxian," he finally says in almost a whisper.
A slow smile spreads across Wei Wuxian's face. "Lan Zhan... was it always called that?" Lan Zhan gives one short nod. "You had your brother bring the guqin after our first episode together so you could write the song," he points out. "Was it always for me? Right from the start?" Another nod. "Lan Zhan! That morning was the first time I couldn't force myself to ignore how hot you were. I didn't even realize I had a crush on you until that day Su She interrupted our lunch. And you were already writing me songs!" He presses their foreheads together. "That is the most stupidly romantic thing anyone's ever done for me."
After the top pairs from Group B and bottom pairs from Group A film their episode, wherein Song Lan and Xue Yang are voted out (Wei Wuxian is happy to lose Xue Yang, and Song Lan will be around as long as Xiao Xingchen is around, so he's pleased with these results), they finally start seeing Nie Huaisang, Ouyang Zizhen, Bao Shan, and Lan Jingyi on set, as all six remaining pairs will be in episode 11.
"WEI-XIONG! WANGJI-XIONG!" Nie Huaisang shouts from basically as far away as he can be and still be in the same building, waving his arms.
"NIE-XIONG, STOP ANNOYING THE CREW!" he shouts back. Nie Huaisang has already grabbed Ouyang Zizhen by the arm and started hauling him over, so Wei Wuxian takes Lan Zhan's hand and goes to meet them.
"He has never called me that before," Lan Zhan murmurs.
"I think it's his way of showing off that he knows we're together," Wei Wuxian says back quietly. "Putting you on equal footing with me."
Ouyang Zizhen spends their introductions trying very hard not to boggle at their joined hands, but as soon as that's done Nie Huaisang simply crows, "I knew it! You got together in between 云与海 and 时候, didn't you? I know you far too well, Wei-xiong, I could tell you weren't prepared for what happened during that song. Afterward you were all jumpy—like, in a good way, but definitely like it took you by surprise. Whereas after 时候, you were clearly just waiting until you could get back to your apartment and devour each other whole."
Wei Wuxian sighs. At least he knows that if it were that obvious to anyone who didn't know him so well, Yanli would have warned him (and even Mianmian, despite apparently having suspicions about them, didn't figure it out with any certainty).
Lan Jingyi bounces up to them and throws an arm around Ouyang Zizhen. "Zizhen! I haven't seen you in two days! I missed you so much!" He plants a wet, loud kiss on Zizhen's cheek. "Nie-laoshi, aren't you gonna introduce me to Wei-laoshi? I've always wanted to meet him!"
He does not seem to notice Wei Wuxian and Lan Zhan holding hands at all. He gushes over meeting Wei Wuxian, then babbles a bit about how everyone online seemed to think that he should have been paired with Nie-laoshi, but only because none of them knew that while he and Nie-laoshi are very openly gremlins, Ouyang Zizhen is a secret gremlin, which he knows because this is the fourth variety show they've done together.
Nie Huaisang's smile says that he was very much aware of this when he insisted on pairing with Ouyang Zizhen. How, Wei Wuxian has no idea, because as far as he knows Nie Huaisang has never worked with either of the two younger men, but he wouldn't be Huaisang if he didn't know things he shouldn't.
After a few minutes, Bao Shan comes by to collect her junior, and it's Wei Wuxian's turn to bow and gush a bit about meeting such a legend. She is clearly used to this reception and accepts it quite gracefully. She compliments him on his performance at last year's New Years Eve concert, which he tries to accept with half as much grace and fails miserably, blushing and stammering.
Before she pulls Jingyi away, she glances just once pointedly at their hands, which as far as Wei Wuxian could tell she hadn't looked at at all before, and simply says, "Good for you. I look forward to seeing what you've got for us this week."
Jingyi follows her glance and his eyes bulge out. "Oh fuck. For real?" he blurts out, and Bao Shan rolls her eyes in an ever-suffering but affectionate way. "I mean, uh. Sorry. That's awesome! For you guys!" and gives them a thumbs up as Bao Shan pulls him away.
Chapter 14 End Notes:
Music in this chapter:
Call and Answer by Barenaked Ladies. I don't have a Mandarin translation, although now I might make one lol.
Look, I fully understand that this is a weird-ass choice of song, which in all likelihood nobody would ever, in a million years, consider performing on a Chinese variety show. But I was like ok, I want them to do one English song.
And then I opened up my music app to go through and see if I had anything that might work, and this was literally the first song I saw and I was just like. Oh. Actually. That is absolutely perfect. That is the exact song they need to perform in this moment. And I had the whole staging and blocking and emotional journey pictured immediately. And I even had a convenient Rock Uncle to have introduced WWX to BNL!
约定 (Yuēdìng, Commitment) by Michael Wong. (JSYK the song itself does not have the discordant bit and pause in the middle that sets up the tragic ending of the video.)